Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Some days I think, "Hurray!! Can't wait. This is gonna be so much fun!"
Then there are other days.
Those other days scream and stomp their feet and whisper doubts into my head. They try to make me believe I will never make it. It's all too hard. And WHO do I think I am anyway! They try to make me do the whole class before I've even started and then shout accusations when I can't seem to get it together.
Because, of course, no one can really accomplish anything before they've even started, can they? I can't plan out the whole school thing and see exactly how it will work and how it will end. My mind wants to have everything figured out and know the steps and see the final outcome.But that is impossible.
The reality is, a great deal of this is learning to simply trust God. Simply trust that I will be able to walk as HE directs. For each of the steps I take, HE is ahead of me. HE is in the tomorrow and I simply have to trust that HE is not fretting or worrying about things. HE has it all figured out, and nothing will surprise HIM. HE is big enough to carry me through each moment of every day. I do not have to have it all planned out. All I have to do is take one step at a time and leave the outcome up to HIM.
And in the trusting, there is rest.